Rays of sunshine

I've been in a bit of a dark slump lately and thought it would be good for me to share some good things going on in my life. On a personal note I have made a decision to take up running. It's something I did more in high school, sort of enjoyed and it's something Joel's always enjoyed doing. My goal isn't to run a marathon but instead to take all my emotions and frustrations of the day to the track and run them off! Each time I go out is time I'm just "Jamie," not Mommy, wife, cook, maid......I could go on. Anyway, I've been running for a week now and I have noticed a huge change in my daily energy level and attitude. I love it!!

Another bright spot in my life is of course my kiddos. They bring a smile to my face each and every day, I'm so thankful for them! Thomas just finished up his 2nd grade year. It's hard to believe that I am now the mother of a 3rd grader! He's so smart, athletic and just a great little boy (ssshhh....don't tell him I called him that, he'd be less than impressed with me! ha ha) I can't wait to see what the next year brings for him!


Braeden completed his Kindergarten year, he had a really terrific teacher and we are sad to see the year come to an end. He is so very excited to be a 1st grader in the Fall though and is excited about having lunch at school with all the big kids! He started playing soccer this Spring and really loves it. We were very lucky with the team and coach, they are awesome! Braeden is such an easy going, fun loving little guy....he's a true blessing to our family.

Kolton has become our little-big man in a short period of time. It feels as though one day he were this tiny toddler, barely toting around and now he's sleeping in his very own big boy bed! He loves it and has made the transition effortless, phew! He loves to spend time with his big brothers, attempting to keep up with everything they do but adores his quiet time with Sissy...always more than enough kisses for her!

Our little miss Caylee Marie is 9 months old now and growing up before my very eyes, my tiny little baby is no more! Instead I see a happy, sweet baby girl. Her first tooth popped through the same week she learned to army crawl! She is able to 'crawl' anywhere she wants and is now learning to pull herself up on things....scary!! It goes without saying that I am loving every minute of all the fun dresses, hair accessories and great things that come with having a daughter. I can't wait to see what the future holds for her! She is the perfect ending in our family.

There's no use crying over spilt milk....

I've come to learn that it's not the spilled milk that I'm crying over, it's all the built up emotion that spills out when the cup happens to tip over. This week (or last few months even) has been filled with a hard dose of reality and I'm on the floor throwing a tantrum like my two year old toddler, screaming "It's NOT fair!!"
Without getting into the tiny details of my current situation I will say that my family finds ourselves in the midst of a painful time, with more questions than answers. Some ask, "How's your family?" or "How's your brother?"......I appreciate the thought but honestly don't know how to answer. We are all doing the best we can, my brother is doing the best he can BUT my brother's in JAIL....that is reality. He's not on vacation, simply absent from family gatherings and birthdays, or even just off somewhere screwing around being a silly boy. He's not going to come to anything for a long time, a REALLY long time.........I can't swallow this for the huge lump in my throat. The latest estimate we have is 12 years. 12 years of birthday parties, Christmases, Thanksgivings and family milestones. It hardly seems fair.
I say all these things and some may think, she's in la-la land. Her brother did wrong and should be punished accordingly. I accept the fact that he did wrong (despite the fact that I lack all the information from that night) and the fact that he will be punished for his mistake....however I DO NOT accept the fact that we are supposed to make decisions based on fractional information, I DO NOT accept the fact that others are making judgments based on second hand information and partial truths. How quick people are to make their harsh judgments from behind their TV's and computer screens and how easily they forget that this man is someone's son, brother, father and friend. He's a good man, never quick to anger, always the peace maker and accepting of people. (can you picture me on the ground right now, kicking and screaming like a toddler?!?!)
Sorry but today I'm a glass half empty kinda girl....2011, I say bah hum bug!