Monday, March 21, 2011

Creations for Caylee


Busy hands are happy hands, right?! I'm not sure happy is what I'm going for but with my hands busy, my brain follows and I don't dwell. So I began crafting more over the past couple of weekends. A great friend of mine was generous enough to share with me how to make these super cute flowers and I have kind of taken off from there. I made Caylee a few headbands.....they are so adorable! She may end up with one in every color I can get my hands on. I've also started trying out other techniques to make some different types of flowers.....it really is never ending in the crafting world.




A neighbor of ours recently had their first baby, a little girl and I thought it would be fun to make her a little something. It was so much fun making a newborn sized headband, so tiny and sweet! Caylee and I will deliver her gift sometime this week.

Sunday, March 13, 2011

How strong does he think I am?

Over the course of my life I have had many people tell me "God will not give you more than you can handle." While I sincerely appreciate the intention behind the sentence, I am struggling this past week with the thought. How strong does he think I am? At this current point I don't feel that I am strong enough to handle more of ANYTHING, not even a spilled glass of juice.

My brother is never far from my thoughts these days.....each and every day. As I go about my normal routine I find myself feeling guilty for enjoying some lazy Saturday morning cartoons with the boys or as I'm enjoying a beautiful ray of sunshine that has decided to peak out from behind a cloud; my thoughts turn to him, when will be the next time he feels the warmth of that same sun? Even the rain, as it falls from the gray skies above; when will he feel the wetness upon his face? It seems and feels as though a death has occurred in our family. Will I ever feel 'normal' again? And what does that mean....does it mean I will simply forget the fact that my brother is not living free? Or will I accept it and move forward. From here forward is the next several weeks and possibly even months of court hearings and maybe even a trial.
It's been nearly impossible to read and hear the things the media has written, they think they have created a profile of my brother for the world to know. What a joke....they have no idea who he is and have portrayed him unfairly. This is painful for me and the fact that we must sit in silence only adds to the sting of an open wound.

Wednesday, March 9, 2011

"Every flower that ever bloomed, had to go through a whole lot of dirt to get there."

This beautiful saying came on a card from a dear friend and has grabbed my attention. I want to staple it to myself in hopes that the ink may seep into my pores and the words into my soul. It would also be nice if it served as a warning for those around me, "Please handle with care, I am fragile". The last few days have been one long extension of a nightmare, one I relive daily with the addition of information and events. I am fighting so hard to keep moving, one foot in front of the other. It's amazing that in the midst of so much pain and confusion the world around me just keeps moving and so I must try to keep moving as well.
Please pray, pray for my brother...may he feel the love of his family, may he have peace of mind knowing that his sweet little boy is well taken care of, and may he find forgiveness within himself. Pray for my family, may we also feel the love and support of those around us, may we find the strength within to make it through this storm that thunders so loudly around us. I am so thankful to all those around me who have been so supportive; kind words, a warm meal and a beautiful bouquet of flowers....some may say each one a small gesture but each means SO much. I am blessed to have you all.